Confessions of a Recovering Nickel-A-Holic

March 21, 2019

Sometimes you’re deep in a toxic relationship and can’t see the signs. I know because it happened to me. It started at age eleven. I counted down the days until my 11th birthday when I could get my ears pierced. The girls at the piercing store let me select earrings (hypo-allergenic stainless steel hearts). They drew dots on my ears with a marker, placed the […]

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Santa Claus and Poopgate

December 21, 2018

Christmas joy filled the air. Ornaments glistened, smiles radiated, and lights twinkled. Santa awaited … well would await (WAIT emphasized) in a matter of several hours. My daughter Sydney eagerly anticipated this year’s visit while our two year old Jenson hesitantly checked out the man in the red coat from a distance and shook his head no. We put in our name (and cell phone […]

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How My Husband’s Mid-Life Crisis Car Saved My Life

November 2, 2018

This car was never supposed to happen. I still remember the day my husband Doug broached the topic. “I really want to get a fast sports car.” Doug has always been a bit car obsessed, but a two-seater for a family needing at least three seats? We were definitely outside the practical zone. I had just come back from a meeting where a psychologist talked […]

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A Forgotten Art

September 7, 2018

The picture hangs prominently displayed in our master bathroom. On it, a word I need to remember before the start of each day. Many of the words come more naturally: love, dream, create. Yet one highlighted word stands out in a sea of action oriented verbs – be. It’s an unnatural word in a world where hustle and achievement are heralded. Get that project completed. […]

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Faith Over Fear!

July 12, 2018

Hello friends! Today I’m excited to introduce you to my amazing writer and speaker friend Jennifer Goebbel. She is a mama of three girls and one boy, married for 19+ years, and has a God-given gift to teach (I love listening to her speak and marvel as she brings the Bible to life in new ways) . She is guest posting today on the blog, […]

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The Truth About You

June 29, 2018

Tuck in. Talk. Pray. And make sure to say the “signature phrase”. Bedtime is rapidly evolving with a 12 year-old daughter in the midst of puberty. It used to involve story time, holding her hand and lying next to her in her bed until she fell asleep. But it’s always included that one thing I never want her to forget. “You are loved & special,” […]

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The Best Gift Of All

May 12, 2018

Your belly became the place I first got to know you. The thump of your heartbeat, your beautiful voice, the rhythm of your soul. You made me feel safe and gave me a place to grow. You were there. I made my way into this brave new world. Wide eyed and uncertain. Bright lights, big smiling faces, and cool crisp air. You were there. I […]

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Close Encounter In An Airport Bathroom

April 26, 2018

It started off as a typical Thursday afternoon after a week of business travel. Turn in rental car. Schlep barefoot through security checkpoint. Bra wire pat down by female TSA agent. Board returning flight. Stow bag. Insert purple earbuds. Listen to chill music while gazing out airplane window. Land at DFW airport and taxi 15 minutes to gate. Grab carry on bag. Head up exit […]

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A Poem Of Thanks This Good Friday

March 30, 2018

How did it feel To leave perfection To come from heaven To face rejection? How did it feel To know what was coming The trial, the judgment, The abuse and the shunning? How did it feel Asking your dear friends to pray And finding them napping Unable to stay awake? How did it feel To wait for the day When one you discipled Would be […]

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Grace for the Holiday Griever (Part 3 of 3)

December 23, 2017

Receiving Grace (Part 3 of “Grace for the Holiday Griever” blog series) No amount of presents under the tree or holiday glad tidings could fill the void. Everything seemed immaterial. It was our first Christmas without our son, and life felt empty and hallow. During this time, God revealed his deep love for the grieving heart. It showed up in special cards from people who […]

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Grace For The Holiday Griever (Part 2 of 3)

December 11, 2017

  Part 2: Honoring Your Loved One With Grace We got the Christmas boxes down from the attic and started unpacking. A surge of emotion hit as I pulled out our four stockings (Doug, Kristin, Sydney, and Jenson). It was our first Christmas without our son Jenson, and it flashed me back to our first dinner out after he passed away. “How many in your […]

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Grace For The Holiday Griever (Part 1 of 3)

November 17, 2017

How do you navigate when grief rears its ugly head and threatens to steal your holiday cheer? If you’re feeling the sting of grief this holiday season, this three-part series “grace for the holiday griever” is for you. Part 1: Grace & Space When grief pounced its way into our lives five years ago, I had no idea how suffocating and all consuming it would […]

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Unlocking A New Level of Strength

September 29, 2017

“Why do you have a weird rock in your drawer?” my eleven year old daughter Sydney asked. Oh, the mysterious rock. I’ve been holding onto that rock for several years now. This rock birthed itself at a writing and speaking conference called She Speaks. At the end of the last session, they asked us to still our spirit and listen for one word from God […]

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Finding Your Unique Purpose

September 8, 2017

The woman directly in front of me in aerobics class collapsed to the ground. I stood motionless in my white Reebok high tops shocked and conflicted – wishing I could help but knowing I’d do more harm than good. Another woman in our class moved with command towards the woman on the floor. She began giving CPR. If only I’d paid more attention in the […]

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Enough With the Fear Factor

July 1, 2017

“The cave you fear to enter holds the treasures you seek.”     — Joseph Campbell Fear can hold us back from some of the most exhilarating joy we’ll ever experience.  Fear whispers lies at us: “You can’t do that.” “Who do you think you are?” “Don’t even bother.  You’ll just fail.” Like a bully at the playground, fear pounces just as we get the […]

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A Simple Act With Big Impact

May 8, 2017

Today is a hard day.  It is the five year anniversary of the death of our sweet boy Jenson. Two words … Monkeys and Montenegro … are helping me remember what we leave behind can far outlive our time on this earth. Last week multiple requests for Monkey Grins* came in. *For those new to the blog, you may be wondering what is a Monkey […]

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A Message of Love

February 8, 2017

From the board outside my daughter’s school with her name flashing in recognition for the leadership award she’d won, my car was drawn like a magnet to the last place I saw my other child Jenson.  His gravesite. I sat on the ground next to his tombstone, my way in this world of being as close to him as possible, feeling torn between the dichotomies love brings […]

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Wedding Blunders

December 13, 2016

Today is our 13th wedding anniversary.  I still remember the excitement of first meeting Doug.  I spotted him at church with a friend of mine.  “Who’s that cute new guy?” I curiously asked my friend Patti. I remember the first time he told me he loved me.  The excitement of seeing his phone number light up on my phone.  The moment I finally understood what […]

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Moments That Matter

November 9, 2016

It was red for over two hours.  Screaming teens and tweens.  The sound of loud music ripping throughout the arena as Taylor Swift performed song after song on her “Red” concert tour. We had decided on a whim that day to try and score tickets (or should I say Doug scored tickets and dropped my daughter Sydney and me off at the stadium while he […]

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Reading Between the Lines

May 21, 2016

I remember the day the doctor told us more about the surgery.  He would go in through the front of the neck cutting a two inch incision. The front.  A two inch incision.  Would it look like someone slit my neck?  Would the scar become the new focal point of my appearance?  Fears swirled around in my head. The doctor answered the questions before I had time to ask […]

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